Monday, December 2, 2013
yelling
my husband repeatedly says he'll do something and then doesn't follow
through. so in the interest of NOT being a martyr, i do it myself
because (bear with me here) i'm doing it for ME--no one else seems to give a shit if the house is a
shambles. and many times i have asked
him to do something and then started to do it myself within minutes, i
guess as sort of a point that it needs to get done NOW, not just
whenever he feels like it, if he even remembers.
the
thing with the kids is that we have made chores/jobs/tasks a mandatory
part of daily life, and they have come to accept that (if begrudgingly
sometimes). so
when they are just wanting to play (and add to the mess) all day, i get
frustrated. i really think the screw-up in our rhythm is what made
things so bad. i had to trade the screentime rules for extra sleep (the
need for which was brought on by more couple time at night...staying up
way too late), and normally they have to do their daily jobs before
getting screen time, which is strictly limited under normal
circumstances. having unlimited screentime caused them to self-regulate
and it lost it's novelty (a good thing). so then it turned to "we
can't go anywhere until the jobs are done". but then they got involved
in playing (another good thing) and the desire to go somewhere
disappeared. result: no more ammo for me. and who am i to disrupt one
thing i desire very much from my children--that they are happily playing
all day long, no screens, no field trips?
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Feeling Scroogey Already - Holiday Stress
i have come to dread the holidays. there are quite a few reasons, and i'm sure they are not unique. in order to get then off my chest without whining to my friends during this month of gratitude, i shall make one of my beloved lists, right here in my very own corner of the interwebs.
~ the money issue ~
we are broke. we have been broke for the past 4 years due to hubs being in college and our only income being grants and loans. and of course, being paid a chunk of money at the beginning of the semester pretty much guaranteed that we were broke by the end of it. but our level of brokeness has increased as each year has gone by. back in the day, i had a budget of $500 for xmas. that seems extravagant to some and lame to others. the budget declined over the years and well, last year it plummeted to $100. i made it work, and i was actually quite pleased with the results. we restricted the number of gifts to 3 per kid, and i scoured the thrift stores for weeks and weeks. I ended up finding each child presents that they were thrilled to get, and they didn't care a stitch that they were secondhand. I did buy a few knew things, but not a lot. socks. toothbrushes. new crayons. dollar store trinkets for the stockings.
~ the time/energy/opportunity issue ~
so every year that we are broke, i have to find creative ways to provide gifts for our family members. i have tons of craft supplies and could easily, between my husband and myself, be able to produce lovely gifts for everyone on our lists for little to nothing out of pocket for us. but time and opportunity are a rare commodity around here. so the handmade stuff usually ends up going to the extended family. Last year they got hand-dipped beeswax tapers, handmade wool dryer balls, handmade (melt & pour) soaps, etc. in the past i have done sugar free & fat free hot chocolate mix (bc all of the grandparents and aunts/uncles are more "diet" conscious than we are -- we prefer whole-ish/"real" foods and not over-processed chemical shitstorms), felted wool coasters, crocheted whimsical/unique bookmarks, knitted/crocheted scarves, inexpensive photobooks (from CVS) of the "best of 20XX", etc. simple, quick stuff from supplies already onhand; things that are unique and infused with love. but those particular things are not the best gifts for children (with the exception of the photobooks -- they have been a bit hit with the littles!).
~ is it worth it? ~
for children, i mean. to make things. my kids are slobs. because of a combination of against-the-grain parenting philosophies, my desire to avoid conflict/take the path of least resistance, and my own laziness when my older children were younger, i have failed to establish good habits in my children. habits regarding taking care of their items and their home environment. if i am not on top of everything everyday by myself, the whole house goes to shit REALLY quickly. so i try to supply my children with sturdy, high-quality, repairable toys so that they will withstand rough use and last a long time. they still manage to break these toys. an overabundance of clinical-level hyperactivity amongst my children does not help things (it also drives me batshit and i have to take sedatives to make it through some days without completely flipping out). so when it comes to handmaking playthings for them, i am apprehensive. i have made many baby toys which have held up well bc they are simple crocheted/knitted or carved wood toys. but then the simple dress-up clothes have not held up so so well. drawstring to the cape goes missing and suddenly it's a useless piece of cloth. the ladies full-skirted half-slip that was upcycled into a little girls dress-up ball gown got the petticoat ripped off of it, so now it is a short, "flapper" dress. still loved, but disappointing to me. the bendy dolls and gnomes that i have experimented with in the past have been taken and ruined, whether by having been left in the yard at the mercy of the elements, or kicked unter a bed to gather dust bunnies and provide the inevitable florida bugs a tasty feast. so while i want more than anything for my children to have these beautiful, handcrafted, open-ended toys, made with love by their mama, i cannot bear the heartbreak of seeing those things destroyed.
~ the influx of shit ~
"shit" being stuff. new stuff. all five kids' birthdays from november to february, and xmas thrown in there. with overly generous grandparents in the picture, i'd say we end up with AT LEAST 50 new playthings (or plat SETS) in the house during those 3 months. that doesn't include the gifts that hubs and i receive. it's great that the kids get fresh playthings, really. i do not resent the generosity that provides my children with things we could never afford. i am a minimalst at heart, and we have 7 people living in a house built for 4. take that an add to it the garage that acts as a storage unit for everything from things we still haven't unpacked since we moved in 9 years ago (I KNOW) to things friends who lived with us for a while left, things we inherited when various elderly family members passed away, and of course, things that are no longer useful to us (outgrown clothes, toys, etc). we just have too much stuff. we have PLENTY of storage space. it is just not used efficiently, and there is a ton of stuff in there that just doesn't need to be. but i do not want to just chuck it all and be done with it, since deep in the rubble there are sentimental things from my childhood (or my children's infancy) that i truly want to keep for scrapbooks and/or memory boxes. so to chuck everything at once would be to risk losing something precious. (i promise, i'm not a hoarder. really. i'm talking memory boxes the size of a file box here.)
over the years, my children have destroyed many sentimental items of mine. i have hardened my heart to it and told myself over and over that "they're just THINGS." but that doesn't make it any less sad. i finally packed up the irreplaceable stuff and put it in a box on a high shelf in a locked room, to be taken back down when the kids are MUCH older. so i get that things are just things. i do not have a hard time deciding to get rid of things, and i have become more and more ruthless about it in the recent past. i lamented to my husband that we get rid of things that we shouldn't HAVE to get rid of, because if we are going to be able to teach the children how to take care of things, said things (all things, not just toys, but household items, too) need to be stripped to a minimum. so that is the idea while i cull our possessions these days. this time of year gives us a chance to start over. but the culling is tedious and can be very overwhelming.
~ and finally, nuclear-family-of-origin issues ~
my nuclear family of origin (mom, dad, sis) are not close. i won't hijack this by explaining why, bc that would take days. however, suffice it to say that the holidays rub salt into the wound that i have tried to keep swept under the rug of my consciousness. it hurts. i do not have a close, loving relationship that i so desperately crave with my family. so when holidays come around and we can't get together due to schedule conflicts, i feel undervalued. this is especially true when my sister is able to make the trip to visit our parents and i am not. so i go to my in-laws' house and celebrate with my husband's family, all the while feeling lonely and unloved because my own family did not try harder to include me in their celebration. and then when we DO get together, it is surface-level visiting with a slightly formal air to it. then the (always brief) visit is over and i am left feeling abandoned again. i have friends who are very close with their parents and siblings. i have learned to be apathetic about it, but underneath that i am envious and wistful. and the worst part is, i feel like it's too late to fix it. i have closed the door of my heart to them after enduring far too many rejections.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
so all of that, you see, is why i like the holiday season to pass as quickly as possible so we can get on with starting a fresh new year (and perhaps consuming an entire bottle of champagne myself on NYE, haha), and i can focus on enjoying the lovely florida winter weather. this too shall pass.
~ namaste ~
(at least i keep telling myself that)
~ the money issue ~
we are broke. we have been broke for the past 4 years due to hubs being in college and our only income being grants and loans. and of course, being paid a chunk of money at the beginning of the semester pretty much guaranteed that we were broke by the end of it. but our level of brokeness has increased as each year has gone by. back in the day, i had a budget of $500 for xmas. that seems extravagant to some and lame to others. the budget declined over the years and well, last year it plummeted to $100. i made it work, and i was actually quite pleased with the results. we restricted the number of gifts to 3 per kid, and i scoured the thrift stores for weeks and weeks. I ended up finding each child presents that they were thrilled to get, and they didn't care a stitch that they were secondhand. I did buy a few knew things, but not a lot. socks. toothbrushes. new crayons. dollar store trinkets for the stockings.
~ the time/energy/opportunity issue ~
so every year that we are broke, i have to find creative ways to provide gifts for our family members. i have tons of craft supplies and could easily, between my husband and myself, be able to produce lovely gifts for everyone on our lists for little to nothing out of pocket for us. but time and opportunity are a rare commodity around here. so the handmade stuff usually ends up going to the extended family. Last year they got hand-dipped beeswax tapers, handmade wool dryer balls, handmade (melt & pour) soaps, etc. in the past i have done sugar free & fat free hot chocolate mix (bc all of the grandparents and aunts/uncles are more "diet" conscious than we are -- we prefer whole-ish/"real" foods and not over-processed chemical shitstorms), felted wool coasters, crocheted whimsical/unique bookmarks, knitted/crocheted scarves, inexpensive photobooks (from CVS) of the "best of 20XX", etc. simple, quick stuff from supplies already onhand; things that are unique and infused with love. but those particular things are not the best gifts for children (with the exception of the photobooks -- they have been a bit hit with the littles!).
~ is it worth it? ~
for children, i mean. to make things. my kids are slobs. because of a combination of against-the-grain parenting philosophies, my desire to avoid conflict/take the path of least resistance, and my own laziness when my older children were younger, i have failed to establish good habits in my children. habits regarding taking care of their items and their home environment. if i am not on top of everything everyday by myself, the whole house goes to shit REALLY quickly. so i try to supply my children with sturdy, high-quality, repairable toys so that they will withstand rough use and last a long time. they still manage to break these toys. an overabundance of clinical-level hyperactivity amongst my children does not help things (it also drives me batshit and i have to take sedatives to make it through some days without completely flipping out). so when it comes to handmaking playthings for them, i am apprehensive. i have made many baby toys which have held up well bc they are simple crocheted/knitted or carved wood toys. but then the simple dress-up clothes have not held up so so well. drawstring to the cape goes missing and suddenly it's a useless piece of cloth. the ladies full-skirted half-slip that was upcycled into a little girls dress-up ball gown got the petticoat ripped off of it, so now it is a short, "flapper" dress. still loved, but disappointing to me. the bendy dolls and gnomes that i have experimented with in the past have been taken and ruined, whether by having been left in the yard at the mercy of the elements, or kicked unter a bed to gather dust bunnies and provide the inevitable florida bugs a tasty feast. so while i want more than anything for my children to have these beautiful, handcrafted, open-ended toys, made with love by their mama, i cannot bear the heartbreak of seeing those things destroyed.
~ the influx of shit ~
"shit" being stuff. new stuff. all five kids' birthdays from november to february, and xmas thrown in there. with overly generous grandparents in the picture, i'd say we end up with AT LEAST 50 new playthings (or plat SETS) in the house during those 3 months. that doesn't include the gifts that hubs and i receive. it's great that the kids get fresh playthings, really. i do not resent the generosity that provides my children with things we could never afford. i am a minimalst at heart, and we have 7 people living in a house built for 4. take that an add to it the garage that acts as a storage unit for everything from things we still haven't unpacked since we moved in 9 years ago (I KNOW) to things friends who lived with us for a while left, things we inherited when various elderly family members passed away, and of course, things that are no longer useful to us (outgrown clothes, toys, etc). we just have too much stuff. we have PLENTY of storage space. it is just not used efficiently, and there is a ton of stuff in there that just doesn't need to be. but i do not want to just chuck it all and be done with it, since deep in the rubble there are sentimental things from my childhood (or my children's infancy) that i truly want to keep for scrapbooks and/or memory boxes. so to chuck everything at once would be to risk losing something precious. (i promise, i'm not a hoarder. really. i'm talking memory boxes the size of a file box here.)
over the years, my children have destroyed many sentimental items of mine. i have hardened my heart to it and told myself over and over that "they're just THINGS." but that doesn't make it any less sad. i finally packed up the irreplaceable stuff and put it in a box on a high shelf in a locked room, to be taken back down when the kids are MUCH older. so i get that things are just things. i do not have a hard time deciding to get rid of things, and i have become more and more ruthless about it in the recent past. i lamented to my husband that we get rid of things that we shouldn't HAVE to get rid of, because if we are going to be able to teach the children how to take care of things, said things (all things, not just toys, but household items, too) need to be stripped to a minimum. so that is the idea while i cull our possessions these days. this time of year gives us a chance to start over. but the culling is tedious and can be very overwhelming.
~ and finally, nuclear-family-of-origin issues ~
my nuclear family of origin (mom, dad, sis) are not close. i won't hijack this by explaining why, bc that would take days. however, suffice it to say that the holidays rub salt into the wound that i have tried to keep swept under the rug of my consciousness. it hurts. i do not have a close, loving relationship that i so desperately crave with my family. so when holidays come around and we can't get together due to schedule conflicts, i feel undervalued. this is especially true when my sister is able to make the trip to visit our parents and i am not. so i go to my in-laws' house and celebrate with my husband's family, all the while feeling lonely and unloved because my own family did not try harder to include me in their celebration. and then when we DO get together, it is surface-level visiting with a slightly formal air to it. then the (always brief) visit is over and i am left feeling abandoned again. i have friends who are very close with their parents and siblings. i have learned to be apathetic about it, but underneath that i am envious and wistful. and the worst part is, i feel like it's too late to fix it. i have closed the door of my heart to them after enduring far too many rejections.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
so all of that, you see, is why i like the holiday season to pass as quickly as possible so we can get on with starting a fresh new year (and perhaps consuming an entire bottle of champagne myself on NYE, haha), and i can focus on enjoying the lovely florida winter weather.
~ namaste ~
(at least i keep telling myself that)
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Monday, September 23, 2013
My Dollar Tree Shopping List
...because i see this all over pinterest and i thought it would be cool to publicly document mine, since it already exists in my phone's notepad app! :D you should know that i have 5 children under the age of 12, and they are VERY curious and VERY hard on things...so a lot of this list is stuff we go through like water because of their mischief and/or play. :/
good deals:
:: timers. i love timers and use them for everything. you can never have enough timers! my kids break things so this is the most affordable way to keep me in good supply.
:: baby board books
:: ziploc baggies
:: tiny trash can liners -- those super thin, scented ones on a roll that are the perfect size for a bathroom trash can.
:: emergency candles -- 6 pack! these sell out quickly. great when you use candles a lot, like at the dinner table or during story time.
:: kids watches. no special features (e.g. alarm), but they tell time! they also sell out quickly
:: seasonal decor (fake flowers, entry table decorations, etc.)
:: hair ties & clips -- since they get lost or broken so easily, i'm not paying 2-3x the price for the name brand ones!
:: funky nail polish and basic makeup -- i rarely wear makeup and the nail polish is just for kids' fun, so quality doesn't really matter. they get the job done. and they have a shade of lipstick that i LOVE, so it is affordable since kids tend to get into that and ruin it (and their easter dress...ahem) as well.
:: natural chap stick -- they have an all-natural beeswax chap stick that comes in 3-packs!
:: purse- or travel-size medications (ibuprofen, tylenol, gas-x, etc.)
:: pregnancy tests! same quality as in your doctor's office. (BUT, you can get a 20-pack for $5 on amazon, so that's definitely more worth it if you are TTC.)
:: liquid soap. this can be hit or miss as i once bought 3 bottles of the stuff that didn't even suds in our hard water.
:: bar soap. they carry the oatmeal/honey and the lavender bars i like so much. i recently started buying the 3-packs of dial natural (or something like that), and i cut them in half and use them as hand soaps -- my kids are huge soap-wasters so this cuts the cost down to about $0.17/"bar". this way, i only end up spending around $1/month on hand soap.
:: placemats
:: pot holders
:: butter dishes (flimsy, yes, but cheaply replaced when they break -- they always get broken no matter how much i pay for them!)
:: kitchen sponges & scouring sponges
:: bandaids & other basic first aid items
:: shoe laces (multipack of different lengths and colors)
:: some school/office supplies (pens, pencils, sharpeners, folders, dividers, sharpies, dry erase markers, scotch tape, workbooks for homeschooling)
:: mailing supplies (for mailing letters and shipping small things that i sell online)
:: magnetic dry erase boards (we have gone through a bunch of these since they are flimsy, but i use them to write my husband's to-do list on.)
:: wooden clothes pins -- i use them for all kinds of things, but most often as chip clips...the kids love to play with them so they get lost/broken a lot, so have to buy more every now and then.
:: kids clothes hangers. they are an affordable way to supply myself with plenty of hangers for the big semi-annual community consignment sale.
:: tiny bottles of goo gone. my kids tend to dump things out, so this is no big loss and i can keep them all around the house. my one complaint is that they don't have the squirty top.
:: duct tape -- small rolls, but since my kids are also tape-wasters, having a smaller roll around means less to waste! especially since a full roll is around $5.
:: spray bottles for DIY household cleaners (i keep them all over the house). another hit-or-miss item; some of them are just fine, others leak right off the bat, argh!
:: playing cards -- 2-packs! these are pretty much one-time-use items for my kids; they cannot keep a deck whole to save their lives!
:: sunglasses -- i have even found fashionable ones that fit over my eyeglasses! and no big loss when they get scratched or broken. i'm done buying $20 sunglasses!
:: twine. i use it to repair woven/wicker baskets that i use for decorative storage all around the house. also good for kids play/projects when i don't feel like having them waste a $5 skein of my yarn!
:: paring knives. i have mostly had success with these. once i had one that fell apart after a few uses, but the new line of brightly colored ones with matching sheath have held up just fine so far.
:: some of the storage containers -- leftover food containers seem decent, the plastic, handled tubs and baskets are too.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
things that are NOT worth buying at dollar tree:
:: scrub brushes -- they break easily and the bristles just suck.
:: can openers -- they just straight up don't work. better off with a $1.97 one from walmart!
:: kitchen towels (unless you like the tea towel size -- i don't; they are just glorified wash rags!)
:: microfiber cleaning cloths -- they fall apart after one wash! i'll stick to my walmart ones, 8/$5. much higher quality.
:: some of the storage containers -- the plastic baskets and woven/chipwood baskets are super flimsy -- they do not hold up to frequent use AT ALL. the sterilite knock-offs are pretty thin and break easily, plus the tops tend to not fit very well and you are liable to crack it trying to get it off!
thanks for reading -- this was fun! :)
good deals:
:: timers. i love timers and use them for everything. you can never have enough timers! my kids break things so this is the most affordable way to keep me in good supply.
:: baby board books
:: ziploc baggies
:: tiny trash can liners -- those super thin, scented ones on a roll that are the perfect size for a bathroom trash can.
:: emergency candles -- 6 pack! these sell out quickly. great when you use candles a lot, like at the dinner table or during story time.
:: kids watches. no special features (e.g. alarm), but they tell time! they also sell out quickly
:: seasonal decor (fake flowers, entry table decorations, etc.)
:: hair ties & clips -- since they get lost or broken so easily, i'm not paying 2-3x the price for the name brand ones!
:: funky nail polish and basic makeup -- i rarely wear makeup and the nail polish is just for kids' fun, so quality doesn't really matter. they get the job done. and they have a shade of lipstick that i LOVE, so it is affordable since kids tend to get into that and ruin it (and their easter dress...ahem) as well.
:: natural chap stick -- they have an all-natural beeswax chap stick that comes in 3-packs!
:: purse- or travel-size medications (ibuprofen, tylenol, gas-x, etc.)
:: pregnancy tests! same quality as in your doctor's office. (BUT, you can get a 20-pack for $5 on amazon, so that's definitely more worth it if you are TTC.)
:: liquid soap. this can be hit or miss as i once bought 3 bottles of the stuff that didn't even suds in our hard water.
:: bar soap. they carry the oatmeal/honey and the lavender bars i like so much. i recently started buying the 3-packs of dial natural (or something like that), and i cut them in half and use them as hand soaps -- my kids are huge soap-wasters so this cuts the cost down to about $0.17/"bar". this way, i only end up spending around $1/month on hand soap.
:: placemats
:: pot holders
:: butter dishes (flimsy, yes, but cheaply replaced when they break -- they always get broken no matter how much i pay for them!)
:: kitchen sponges & scouring sponges
:: bandaids & other basic first aid items
:: shoe laces (multipack of different lengths and colors)
:: some school/office supplies (pens, pencils, sharpeners, folders, dividers, sharpies, dry erase markers, scotch tape, workbooks for homeschooling)
:: mailing supplies (for mailing letters and shipping small things that i sell online)
:: magnetic dry erase boards (we have gone through a bunch of these since they are flimsy, but i use them to write my husband's to-do list on.)
:: wooden clothes pins -- i use them for all kinds of things, but most often as chip clips...the kids love to play with them so they get lost/broken a lot, so have to buy more every now and then.
:: kids clothes hangers. they are an affordable way to supply myself with plenty of hangers for the big semi-annual community consignment sale.
:: tiny bottles of goo gone. my kids tend to dump things out, so this is no big loss and i can keep them all around the house. my one complaint is that they don't have the squirty top.
:: duct tape -- small rolls, but since my kids are also tape-wasters, having a smaller roll around means less to waste! especially since a full roll is around $5.
:: spray bottles for DIY household cleaners (i keep them all over the house). another hit-or-miss item; some of them are just fine, others leak right off the bat, argh!
:: playing cards -- 2-packs! these are pretty much one-time-use items for my kids; they cannot keep a deck whole to save their lives!
:: sunglasses -- i have even found fashionable ones that fit over my eyeglasses! and no big loss when they get scratched or broken. i'm done buying $20 sunglasses!
:: twine. i use it to repair woven/wicker baskets that i use for decorative storage all around the house. also good for kids play/projects when i don't feel like having them waste a $5 skein of my yarn!
:: paring knives. i have mostly had success with these. once i had one that fell apart after a few uses, but the new line of brightly colored ones with matching sheath have held up just fine so far.
:: some of the storage containers -- leftover food containers seem decent, the plastic, handled tubs and baskets are too.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
things that are NOT worth buying at dollar tree:
:: scrub brushes -- they break easily and the bristles just suck.
:: can openers -- they just straight up don't work. better off with a $1.97 one from walmart!
:: kitchen towels (unless you like the tea towel size -- i don't; they are just glorified wash rags!)
:: microfiber cleaning cloths -- they fall apart after one wash! i'll stick to my walmart ones, 8/$5. much higher quality.
:: some of the storage containers -- the plastic baskets and woven/chipwood baskets are super flimsy -- they do not hold up to frequent use AT ALL. the sterilite knock-offs are pretty thin and break easily, plus the tops tend to not fit very well and you are liable to crack it trying to get it off!
thanks for reading -- this was fun! :)
Thursday, March 15, 2012
30 Things in 30 Years
Today I am 30 years old. Holy shit! So, to commemorate this monumental occasion, I wanted to make a list (YESSSS!) of 30 cool things I've done in my 30 years. I will try my best to keep this succinct. ;) Alright, here goes (in attempted chronological order)...
1. I was born. I already knew how to nurse, cry, pee, and poop. I nursed for 18 months. I still cry, pee, and poop. :)
2. I learned to walk and talk. And run and jump and climb. And talk. And ride a bike, and roller skate. And talk.
3. I discovered my love of music and singing. I randomly burst into song, and have a song for just about every situation.
4. I learned to read, 'rite, and 'rithmatize (<--i a="" br="" made="" new="" up="" word="">
5. I became a ballerina, and a pianist. Today, I cherish my electric piano and its 88 weighted keys.
6. I learned to crochet. I have since crocheted afghans for 4 of my children (child #5 is getting a knitted one).
7. I learned to sew. I made doll clothes with my grandmother. I have dreams that someday, a good portion of my family's wardrobe (and other useful fabric items) will be handmade by me. We shall see...
8. I learned to knit. (I looooooove to knit. I make mostly wool diaper covers and toys. I wish I had more time/energy to knit, and I wish I could knit faster. That's a tall order because I'm already a fast knitter. Maybe I should revisit the time/energy issue...)
9. I lived in Switzerland for a year. I attended a local school and was immersed in the culture. I toured Europe on weekends and holidays.
10. I became fluent in Swiss German in a matter of months. Years later, in high school, I learned French.
11. I learned to snow ski...quite well. (I also learned to water ski.)
12. I became a kick-ass cook.
13. I got accepted into and participated in a rigorous high school program that burned me out on school for the rest of my friggin' life.
14. I took an IQ test. The result astounded me. It still does. And it annoys the hell out of me, too.
15. I discovered that I suffer from mental illness. I have accepted and embraced it, and learned to cope as best I can. That journey will never end.
16. I got involved with the wrong crowd. I got hurt. I got in trouble.
17. I conquered an addiction. I am currently working on conquering another one.
18. I survived abuse. I am still learning to live with it; to recover. It seems like an impossible task. Maybe it is.
19. I had a lot of boyfriends. A lot. Not the healthiest relationships.
20. I got married to a childhood sweetheart.
21. I birthed 5 people, the last of whom I birthed unassisted, in a dimly-lit, peaceful corner of my bedroom. It was the most incredible experience of my life.
22. I accepted my body after the birth of my 4th child.
23. I survived my husband's deployment to Iraq.
24. I started a blog. Personally, I think it's awesome. :)
25. I accepted my physical limitations due to scoliosis, and learned how to cope as best I can. This was after I learned that you can pull ribs out of their sockets in your spine. Yeah. Ouch.
26. I broke my ankle kicking the dog, and dropped a tree on my foot. (Totally different scenarios, years apart. Just stupid-ass things I did that resulted in painful physical injury.)
27. I dropped out of college in order to pursue my real dream: to be a stay-at-home mom.
28. I took on the responsibility of facilitating my children's education. I effing LOVE it.
29. I let my firstborn go. He lives with his dad now. It's bittersweet.
30. I successfully made it through the first year of my 5th child's life without feeding her a drop of formula. We are still happily nursing.
I went and wrote my whole life story (well, maybe not the WHOLE thing) -- in a LIST! What could be better?! I do so love lists.
Happy 30th Birthday to ME!
1. I was born. I already knew how to nurse, cry, pee, and poop. I nursed for 18 months. I still cry, pee, and poop. :)
2. I learned to walk and talk. And run and jump and climb. And talk. And ride a bike, and roller skate. And talk.
3. I discovered my love of music and singing. I randomly burst into song, and have a song for just about every situation.
4. I learned to read, 'rite, and 'rithmatize (<--i a="" br="" made="" new="" up="" word="">
5. I became a ballerina, and a pianist. Today, I cherish my electric piano and its 88 weighted keys.
6. I learned to crochet. I have since crocheted afghans for 4 of my children (child #5 is getting a knitted one).
7. I learned to sew. I made doll clothes with my grandmother. I have dreams that someday, a good portion of my family's wardrobe (and other useful fabric items) will be handmade by me. We shall see...
8. I learned to knit. (I looooooove to knit. I make mostly wool diaper covers and toys. I wish I had more time/energy to knit, and I wish I could knit faster. That's a tall order because I'm already a fast knitter. Maybe I should revisit the time/energy issue...)
9. I lived in Switzerland for a year. I attended a local school and was immersed in the culture. I toured Europe on weekends and holidays.
10. I became fluent in Swiss German in a matter of months. Years later, in high school, I learned French.
11. I learned to snow ski...quite well. (I also learned to water ski.)
12. I became a kick-ass cook.
13. I got accepted into and participated in a rigorous high school program that burned me out on school for the rest of my friggin' life.
14. I took an IQ test. The result astounded me. It still does. And it annoys the hell out of me, too.
15. I discovered that I suffer from mental illness. I have accepted and embraced it, and learned to cope as best I can. That journey will never end.
16. I got involved with the wrong crowd. I got hurt. I got in trouble.
17. I conquered an addiction. I am currently working on conquering another one.
18. I survived abuse. I am still learning to live with it; to recover. It seems like an impossible task. Maybe it is.
19. I had a lot of boyfriends. A lot. Not the healthiest relationships.
20. I got married to a childhood sweetheart.
21. I birthed 5 people, the last of whom I birthed unassisted, in a dimly-lit, peaceful corner of my bedroom. It was the most incredible experience of my life.
22. I accepted my body after the birth of my 4th child.
23. I survived my husband's deployment to Iraq.
24. I started a blog. Personally, I think it's awesome. :)
25. I accepted my physical limitations due to scoliosis, and learned how to cope as best I can. This was after I learned that you can pull ribs out of their sockets in your spine. Yeah. Ouch.
26. I broke my ankle kicking the dog, and dropped a tree on my foot. (Totally different scenarios, years apart. Just stupid-ass things I did that resulted in painful physical injury.)
27. I dropped out of college in order to pursue my real dream: to be a stay-at-home mom.
28. I took on the responsibility of facilitating my children's education. I effing LOVE it.
29. I let my firstborn go. He lives with his dad now. It's bittersweet.
30. I successfully made it through the first year of my 5th child's life without feeding her a drop of formula. We are still happily nursing.
I went and wrote my whole life story (well, maybe not the WHOLE thing) -- in a LIST! What could be better?! I do so love lists.
Happy 30th Birthday to ME!
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Six Senses Saturday
Watching
Twilight: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1. Yup. I'm a Twilight fan. (Team Edward, in case you are wondering ;)). I devoured the books years ago (much to my housework's chagrin, heehee) and LOVED them. I have never been into vampire anything, so this is it for me! So of course I have to keep up with (and own) all of the corresponding movies! :) I went to see this one in the theater on Thanksgiving day with a gal pal (and NO ONE ELSE - WOOT!) and then just purchased it at my localPortal To Hell Walmart last week. LURVE.
Hearing
My whiny baby cry a lot. She's always been a crotchety old man trapped in a fat baby girl, but now she's getting over a cold AND cutting 2 canines. I am so over hearing her cry. I have been tending to her needs her whole life, and I wholeheartedly ascribe to attachment parenting philosophy, but there comes a point when...well, let's just say I have (not-so-)jokingly referred to her as "The Baby Who Cried Wolf" (if that makes any sense) on more than one occasion recently. She is just so. damn. fussy. Wears me out.
Feeling
Yarn. And fabric. I have been crafting. It's part of my... "therapy". It's what I have been doing during my alone time.
As for sewing, I have been making soakers and longies out of old wool sweaters, and then my most recent endeavor has been upcycling some of my late grandmother's wool skirts into double-layer wrap-style diaper covers. I have a favorite fleece wrap that I have been trying to copy and I think I've just about got it down, 3 prototypes in. I plan to do up a tutorial for this here blog when I am confident that it is worth sharing. :)
As for knitting, I am currently working on 2 soakers. (I am obsessed. My baby really doesn't need as many as she has, but I am refreshing her stash, so there!) Then tonight I cast on the Pebble, something I have seen many times over at SouleMama, but wasn't sure how I felt about it until I saw it made in pink for a baby girl (lurve!). AND, I didn't realize until today that 1) the pattern is free (score!), and 2) REALLY simple (double score!). So tonight, as I watched TBDP1 (think about it...got it?), I cast on a Pebble for Brigit, in lavender cotton, to be worn alone as a tank top this coming summer (this is Florida, you know. It's often pointless to knit warm woolies...). Pics to come when it is finished, I assure you! :)
Smelling
Not much of anything. We are having major pollen around here, and it turns out I'm allergic to pine! I mean, I've had allergies for-like-ever, but this is the first year that I've paid attention to WHAT pollen was actually in the air when I'm having symptoms, and that's only because I noticed that I wasn't having symptoms back during the last pollen season, which was in the fall. That was cedar. Not allergic. Pine? CHECK - VERY ALLERGIC. So I've had this cold - or is it hay fever? Who knows...whatever it is (probably both, because hay fever isn't contagious and we've all been sick...but I supposed it is possible that we all have the same allergies!), there has been lots of sneezing and snot, hoarseness and a slight dry, itchy, scratchy cough. I actually lost my voice the other day. I was talking in this silly high-pitched "voice", which was so weird because I have a rather robust voice for a woman (I sing alto, if that says anything). Using Sinupret and garlic oil pills to try and kick this sucker to the curb.
Tasting
My snack of choice lately has been popcorn (the horrible, chemical drenched microwave kind, of which my husband purchased 4 boxes, because they were BOGO and he thought he was doing a good thing, bless him). It's hidden from the children in the coat closet because they are not allowed to eat such junk (I'm such a hypocrite), so I've been sneaking it after they go to bed.
I also found a very old box (yes, box) of Twizzlers, another vice of mine (that's like, all HFCS and red dye - ACK!), in my craft room...I've indulged in a few of those here and there recently...bad crunchy mama!
I need to get back on the wagon of healthy snacks (which I do love!)...I love apples and peanut butter, and I actually got to eat that the other night! It's rare that I get to eat apples. My children consume them like water. I would venture to guess that we go through 10-15 POUNDS of apples a week. And considering that apples are #1 on the Dirty Dozen list so I buy the organic ones, that's a lotta money spent on apples!! But I swear, every time I want to eat apples and peanut butter, we are fresh out of apples, dammit. :/
I bought 10 avocados that were BOGO a week or so ago, and of course they all ripened at once and by the time I realized it, they were overripe and mealy and gross. Not even worth making guac or anything...and I don't even really like guac anymore since I've eaten so many avocados straight (yummm). Guac tastes weird to me now!
Intuiting
[This may not really fall under "intuiting", but it didn't really seem to belong under "feeling" as a sense, either] As several of my recent posts have shown, my feelings have been all over the place, but generally leaning toward the SHIT-TAY end of that spectrum. I've been "ill" since I hit puberty, so I know by now what "symptoms" to watch for and how to treat them. (I put all these illness-related terms in quotes bc being mentally ill is not commonly equated with being "sick", although that is what it is - a chronic illness!...so I use the terms as a kind of hybrid analogy, if you will.) Anyhoo, it sucks that I often have to get close to rock-bottom before I realize things are that bad, but I do know what needs to be done to pull me out. It just takes time. It's a slow, painful process, and there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel, but I know I will at least get to a point when I will not HATE so many things anymore. I'm just working on it, and waiting for that day.
Twilight: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1. Yup. I'm a Twilight fan. (Team Edward, in case you are wondering ;)). I devoured the books years ago (much to my housework's chagrin, heehee) and LOVED them. I have never been into vampire anything, so this is it for me! So of course I have to keep up with (and own) all of the corresponding movies! :) I went to see this one in the theater on Thanksgiving day with a gal pal (and NO ONE ELSE - WOOT!) and then just purchased it at my local
Hearing
My whiny baby cry a lot. She's always been a crotchety old man trapped in a fat baby girl, but now she's getting over a cold AND cutting 2 canines. I am so over hearing her cry. I have been tending to her needs her whole life, and I wholeheartedly ascribe to attachment parenting philosophy, but there comes a point when...well, let's just say I have (not-so-)jokingly referred to her as "The Baby Who Cried Wolf" (if that makes any sense) on more than one occasion recently. She is just so. damn. fussy. Wears me out.
Feeling
Yarn. And fabric. I have been crafting. It's part of my... "therapy". It's what I have been doing during my alone time.
As for sewing, I have been making soakers and longies out of old wool sweaters, and then my most recent endeavor has been upcycling some of my late grandmother's wool skirts into double-layer wrap-style diaper covers. I have a favorite fleece wrap that I have been trying to copy and I think I've just about got it down, 3 prototypes in. I plan to do up a tutorial for this here blog when I am confident that it is worth sharing. :)
As for knitting, I am currently working on 2 soakers. (I am obsessed. My baby really doesn't need as many as she has, but I am refreshing her stash, so there!) Then tonight I cast on the Pebble, something I have seen many times over at SouleMama, but wasn't sure how I felt about it until I saw it made in pink for a baby girl (lurve!). AND, I didn't realize until today that 1) the pattern is free (score!), and 2) REALLY simple (double score!). So tonight, as I watched TBDP1 (think about it...got it?), I cast on a Pebble for Brigit, in lavender cotton, to be worn alone as a tank top this coming summer (this is Florida, you know. It's often pointless to knit warm woolies...). Pics to come when it is finished, I assure you! :)
Smelling
Not much of anything. We are having major pollen around here, and it turns out I'm allergic to pine! I mean, I've had allergies for-like-ever, but this is the first year that I've paid attention to WHAT pollen was actually in the air when I'm having symptoms, and that's only because I noticed that I wasn't having symptoms back during the last pollen season, which was in the fall. That was cedar. Not allergic. Pine? CHECK - VERY ALLERGIC. So I've had this cold - or is it hay fever? Who knows...whatever it is (probably both, because hay fever isn't contagious and we've all been sick...but I supposed it is possible that we all have the same allergies!), there has been lots of sneezing and snot, hoarseness and a slight dry, itchy, scratchy cough. I actually lost my voice the other day. I was talking in this silly high-pitched "voice", which was so weird because I have a rather robust voice for a woman (I sing alto, if that says anything). Using Sinupret and garlic oil pills to try and kick this sucker to the curb.
Tasting
My snack of choice lately has been popcorn (the horrible, chemical drenched microwave kind, of which my husband purchased 4 boxes, because they were BOGO and he thought he was doing a good thing, bless him). It's hidden from the children in the coat closet because they are not allowed to eat such junk (I'm such a hypocrite), so I've been sneaking it after they go to bed.
I also found a very old box (yes, box) of Twizzlers, another vice of mine (that's like, all HFCS and red dye - ACK!), in my craft room...I've indulged in a few of those here and there recently...bad crunchy mama!
I need to get back on the wagon of healthy snacks (which I do love!)...I love apples and peanut butter, and I actually got to eat that the other night! It's rare that I get to eat apples. My children consume them like water. I would venture to guess that we go through 10-15 POUNDS of apples a week. And considering that apples are #1 on the Dirty Dozen list so I buy the organic ones, that's a lotta money spent on apples!! But I swear, every time I want to eat apples and peanut butter, we are fresh out of apples, dammit. :/
I bought 10 avocados that were BOGO a week or so ago, and of course they all ripened at once and by the time I realized it, they were overripe and mealy and gross. Not even worth making guac or anything...and I don't even really like guac anymore since I've eaten so many avocados straight (yummm). Guac tastes weird to me now!
Intuiting
[This may not really fall under "intuiting", but it didn't really seem to belong under "feeling" as a sense, either] As several of my recent posts have shown, my feelings have been all over the place, but generally leaning toward the SHIT-TAY end of that spectrum. I've been "ill" since I hit puberty, so I know by now what "symptoms" to watch for and how to treat them. (I put all these illness-related terms in quotes bc being mentally ill is not commonly equated with being "sick", although that is what it is - a chronic illness!...so I use the terms as a kind of hybrid analogy, if you will.) Anyhoo, it sucks that I often have to get close to rock-bottom before I realize things are that bad, but I do know what needs to be done to pull me out. It just takes time. It's a slow, painful process, and there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel, but I know I will at least get to a point when I will not HATE so many things anymore. I'm just working on it, and waiting for that day.
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